Something To Remember

Something To Remember

By Vernon Gaskill

Copyright 2006 - Spiritpencil Publishing & G. Vernon Gaskill

           She hangs up the phone slowly and though she tries she can't remember. After a moment she rises from the sofa with a sigh and goes to get the last of the laundry out of the dryer so that she can get it folded before getting ready for bed. The laundry is folded and put away and she's in her customary nighttime T-Shirt watching a movie and she still can't remember. When was the last time she went out with her friends? When was the last time she did something spontaneous? When was the last time she wasn't in her nighttime T-Shirt by nine thirty?
           She feels old beyond her years. She used to be fun and crazy and even unpredictable.
           She used to never wear a nighttime T-Shirt.
           She wanted so badly to go when her friends called earlier. A group of her closest friends going to dinner and a movie and then seeing what happened after that, and here she lay, on her bed at nine thirty. Alone.
           She cannot follow the plot of the movie she's watching for wondering what movie her friends are seeing. Where did they eat? What would she have eaten? What was the last movie she saw in a theater? Though she tries, she can't remember.
           She had never been one to plan her life out, but had she done so, it would not have followed this course. It has been said that life is what happens while you're busy making other plans, and in her case, life had most definitely happened.
           The screen on her television blurs along with the rest of the room as tears fill her eyes. She had never felt so lonesome. There is no "other half" available to console her. To tell her everything will be alright. To provide a shoulder clothed in a cotton shirt to catch her tears. Sometimes you can never feel less whole as when you have no better half. She had not lived her whole life without companionship. She had, in fact, been held and she had been loved. But though she tries to recall the last time that had happened, she can't remember.
           A sudden piercing noise rings out and every worry in her head seems to remain behind on the bed as she instinctively rises without wiping her eyes and crosses the hall into the room that holds her world. She reaches down into the crib and cradles her baby in her arms.
           "shhhhh", she whispers, and begins to rock the child in her arms. She wonders what has awakened her little one so far from feeding time and having only been down for an hour or so. But the child is months away from first words, and whatever it was seems to have been cured by a mother's touch. For a moment they stare into each other's eyes, both with tearstains on their cheeks. The child is the first to smile and the Mother's face lights up for the first time tonight. She holds her child's gaze and she can almost physically feel how full her heart is.
           "You're ok, now", she tells her baby. "We're both ok."
           Her child stares back at her with a look that shows no care in the world, and for that moment in time, her Mother's problems vanish as well. She carries her baby back into her bedroom and to the bed she left her worries on a few minutes before. The worries leave the sheets and then the room as they lay down together. She wipes her eyes and kisses her baby's head. She catches herself smiling again and wonders why she was so upset just minutes ago.
           And though she tries, she can't remember.





This story is dedicated to all single mothers. May none of you ever feel alone.